Where do we go from here?

Jallira was dying.

Jallira was dying.

Caer rolled up another piece of cheese with a thin strip of meat and chewed on it though it tasted like cardboard in her mouth. The thought of someone she thought of as a sister, someone she cared for deeply only had weeks to live and it made her stomach flip flop lazily making her feel nauseous.

Giving up on food, Caer abandoned her plate of food on her bed and the movie she was listening to as she paced the length of her bedroom on her ship. She felt more comfortable here than she did in one of the barracks at the monastery. The carpet between her toes were somewhat comforting though the movement was helping to calm her mind somewhat.

Running a hand through her messy hair she came to a halt in front of the bed and flopped onto it, spilling the meat and cheese she’d been eating over onto the floor. Noodle, her fanged Tiglon cat scrambled out from under the bed in a mad dash to grab up ever morsel  as fast as his tongue and legs could manage. Caer ignored the cat and just flopped an arm over her face.

Death by combat, that was one thing. War, even starvation was something she’d seen in her long career as a Jedi. She’d seen cities decimated by bombings, she’d seen villages wiped out by lack of food and everything in between. But watching someone die was something she couldn’t get used to.

Anxiety gnawed at her chest and belly, making it feel like it was difficult to breathe. She stopped and closed off her senses for a moment, letting the darkness fill in the vision she relied upon so much. She started slowly with forcing her muscles to relax. First the muscles in her face, head and neck, then shoulders, back and on down until she was kneeling on the floor and breathing regularly again.

She turned her thoughts to other things.

Raiyden did the smart thing and sent Lyrae’a off back to Alpheridies with the kids. She knew of hiding places there that even Caer and her family knew nothing about.  She knew there was a cave system on their properties that she hadn’t had a chance to fully explore yet and maybe she can take them someplace there, keep them safe under the watchful presence of our god and goddess.

Caer missed home sometimes. The Estherians had been a presence since the beginning, helping build up the people and the planet responsibly in their quiet little way. The home though… it was beautiful. It covered several dozen acres and it’s like a sprawling self sustaining village. Father and mother had the main house along with the kids if they really wanted to stay there, plus seven or eight little private houses for guests and dignitaries who visit. Then there’s the Fosters house, where those who’s kids are visiting or getting training for diplomacy from father, healing skills from mother or just need a place to stay while being wards of the people.

Lyrae’a will take good care of the kids. Or so Caer hope. Lyr had always wanted kids. Or so that’s what mother has said about her. Lyrae’a refuses to talk about herself or about her past really and Caer could understand. The woman had had a very painful life. Had lived through a lot of heart ache.

Maybe she’d take Sheenah up to see Alpheridies sometime. She would show her the cave system, introduce her to Ashla and Bogan, show her what the food and the people were like there. Maybe she could find something peaceful up there to latch onto. Or that was Caers hope. She’d of course have to get permission from the Archon and Arbiters but that wouldn’t be too much of a problem she thought. Alpheridies all but flung themselves at the Republic, so it wasn’t like they were going to run into any Dark sided people there.  It was hard to be dark side and hide well on that planet.

Rubbing her temples she felt the beginnings of a migraine coming and it reminded her she needed sleep. Shoving the now sleeping Tiglon off the bed, she stripped down to nothing and crawled under the covers, soon falling asleep to the sound of Noodles light snoring next to her.

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