I was dared to write this as an article. I would normally NEVER break Caer’s journal for any sort of OOC, but this was just too good to pass up.
Types of Drama Whores and how to combat them
Drama whores. We’ve all seen them, dealt with them and some of us have even been them at times. It’s a term that’s commonly used in role play frequently. What –is- a drama whore you may ask?
Well, according to the Urban dictionary (and well, it’s not really a –valid- dictionary but we’ll roll with it for this article), the top three most and seemingly accurate and popular entries are as followed
A person who thinks their life occurrences are more important than their friends. And always has some utter catastrophe about to happen that must be analyzed by fifty million of their closest friends. And completely disregards their friends problems, because despite already talking to their friends about the problem there is always some reason to tell it again, with more detail, and it is still as important as it was the first 500 times!
One who constantly craves the chaos, feeling, and attention that drama can bring along with it.
A person, male or female; who sees any aspect of their personality or actions in their life as interesting topics. Often the drama whore will send out messages with absolutely no content except for something inflammatory or retaliatory directed at another person(s) they dislike.
Drama whore-ism is a self-feeding condition. As more and more people are fed up with a constant barrage of useless shit they don’t care anything about, the drama whore feels justified by the new attention of being told off. In some cases, the drama whores will band together into a circle jerk, telling each other they’re all right and the other 6 billion people on earth are just jealous.
How do these all fit in terms of RP, and how do they differ from someone who talks about themselves? I’m glad you asked. While narcissism is always a danger and while we all enjoy talking about ourselves, there is a fine line between including ones-self into a conversation or talking about yourself, and making a conversation or issue all about you. These are sometimes called drama llamas if people are easily offended by the term drama whores.
In Rp, there are many ways to have drama. There’s the good drama in the form of In Character development and actions. A good way to have clean and fun drama is perhaps creating a plot that involves intrigue, suspense and create a friendly environment of he said, she said. In an MMORPG, it’s easy to create these kinds of fun environments where everyone agrees to it and finds it a good way to develop a character that may otherwise be difficult to develop; or possibly create friendships or even new enemies to further facilitate Rp.
This type of drama is always welcomed by any community and with any luck and a lot of understanding and a copious amount of communication from all parties involved, there can be a lot of good drama.
Now, let us focus on the bad drama. This is a continual problem in any community, great or small. Drama is always bound to happen and a lot of ways that it can happen. Sometimes it’s accidental, sometimes it’s on purpose. Either way, this type of drama is bad. Let’s take a look at the varying types of drama and drama whores.
-The woe is me drama- This type of person tends to always be upset at something. It doesn’t matter what has happened in their RP or in their life, something or someone is always out to get them. They infiltrate chat rooms, in game channels or even if they have some close friends (if they’ve not managed to drive them off) over the phone or in person and complain constantly. The type of person who feels like the world is against them, nobody likes them, nobody ever asks them to go places with them or invite them to events or even just to hang out. In short- NOBODY likes them. Woe is them. These people generally will go out of their way to make themselves miserable and immediately blame someone else for it. After all, nobody likes them why would it not be someone else who made them miserable?
Combat tactics: Smile and nod boys, smile and nod. Make as many non-committal commentaries as possible. If it gets to be too much, just tell them you’re sorry they’re having a bad day and that you need to focus on something else. Other tactics that work are politely telling the person you are not interested in what they have to say right now and once they calm down you are willing to talk to them. If they persist, a temporary (or permanent) ignore may be the only option. Avoidance tactics are usually the best and if you know someone to be this type of drama seeker, it’s usually a better idea not to engage them at all.
– I do it ALL drama- These people enjoy starting projects, enjoy claiming they like to start projects and then, poof! Disappear into the shadows like a ninja with the runs, or they do actually complete the promised tasks and then demand credit. When they do not receive the credit they feel they are due, they immediately launch into tirades or guilt trips about how they perform all these tasks come up with all the ideas but never receive the proper credit or that nobody appreciates all that they may do. Any slight against them or their project is akin to slapping ones beloved mother in the face with a dead fish.
Combat tactics: Remind them that others do much to help as well. Do your best to point out the strengths in the person, but also give gentle reminders that everyone also has their share of work and everyone does it to the best of their ability. Don’t be overly critical, but it might help to remind them politely that they’re not the center of everyone’s universe.
-The IC taking it OOC drama- These people are the ones who take things that happen in character and then complain about it or create issues about it out of character. These people generally have no concept of the line between IC and OOC, meaning that they’re incapable of separating themselves from their characters. Often times, you see this in newer role players, but you can many times find them in older and more experienced role players as well. These people tend to cry wolf at every opportunity or create problems IC just to they can seek attention for themselves. Many tactics include, starting fights, breaking peoples things, or one of the worst faking their deaths for the sake of people paying attention to their characters supposed demise so that they can bask in the attention or in the hopes that people will beg them not to kill off their character. A lot of times they do actually kill the said character only to return days or weeks later claiming it was all faked for the sake of an imaginary story that didn’t really exist. Once the appeal of being ‘dead’ wears off, they return with a ‘ta-da!’ and immediately start the cycle all over again.
Another example would be someone who starts issues in character, dislikes how things go and immediate jump out of character to demand help, complain about it or start an argument. These people also tend to try and garner sympathy by only stating their side of the story and playing victim. They sometimes fall into the woe is me category.
Combat tactics: Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. Be wary of these types. They often use IC tactics to cause problems OOC. These people tend to not comprehend that what they do is more damaging to a community than help it. Most of the time they don’t care it’s all about them and that’s all that matters. As long as they’re happy, they don’t care who they step on or upset in order to obtain their personal gratification. These types are usually best handled by being reminded that they like the ‘I do it all’ types that the world does not revolve around them or that they’re the end all, be all of role play. Other ways to combat these types of people are to disengage from them completely. They tend not to change their behavior until they’ve isolated themselves with only those who pander to their destructive behavior. Again, if they continue, sometimes a temporary ignore or even a permanent one can be necessary. They hate it when people ignore their behavior and often times will eventually go away or break away from the main community to find a smaller group who is willing to center their attention on them.
I hope this helps in recognizing, combatting and treating this type of behavior among role play communities. These are but a small group of people and most times usually give up their behavior or leave entirely when they don’t receive the attention they want. Remember, they’re people too and as always need to remember that they have feelings as well. Even if they don’t always recognize others feelings, at least try to be mindful of theirs. Good luck and happy role playing!